Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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