U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
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