I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
My breath smells like gin and sadness
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
