That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo