Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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