eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Randomize
