Welp...herpes.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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