is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Randomize
