It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
