I just threw up on my dentist
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
