8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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