shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
he was CRYING into my vagina
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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