I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize