Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Randomize
