spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
