my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize