i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
