they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
the room spins SO much faster in panama
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
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