dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
