i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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