My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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