my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
