do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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