and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize