So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
i think my cat just said my name.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
