It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
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