if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize