bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Randomize