you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
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