i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
