This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
