ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
