I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Randomize
