So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
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i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
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I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
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