thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
All I want is dick and wine.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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