In the future we'll all be gay
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
