I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
