I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
