I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
