Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
God, I missed his penis.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
