I must be too annoying 4 u.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
foreskin is a definite game changer
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
