Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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