turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize