yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
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