she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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