We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
