So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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