Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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