omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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