I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
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