When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
